When I was growing up I was convinced that I would marry Aladdin. It didn’t really occur to me that he wasn’t real; all I knew was that I wanted to have him sing romantic songs to me and take me on magic carpet rides. The same thing happened when I watched The Little Mermaid, Cinderella, Snow White and Sleeping Beauty.
Then I grew up, and I still kind of wanted to marry them all. BUT I also realised that I would never want to marry a stranger after only one day of knowing them, call me crazy if you want but I’m fussy, it takes me at least TWO days to know if I’m even possibly remotely interested in someone and want to be whisked off to their far off castle.
It had also come to my attention that I wanted to be a kick ass princess. I wanted to know that in between my apple pie baking and daily sweeping that I could wield a sword and fight off the most horrid of beasts. By day I would be a sweet, demure and innocent princess and by night a karate kicking, gymnastic flipping, foul mouthed super woman. Let’s face it, every so often your prince is going to let you down, he’s going to get caught by your evil stepmother who has morphed into a giant dragon, he might even be out cold when you are faced with a tentacled sea monster. So we, the delicate princesses we are, have to have daggers strapped to our ankles and a crossbow stowed somewhere easily accessible (I’m thinking the broom closet by the door… you know, the one that no one ever looks in?).
Now don’t get me wrong, I still want to be rescued every once in a while, but we’ll schedule it in maybe for holidays and Sundays? Or every other weekend? I don’t want to emasculate my poor snookums now do I? And look I really wouldn’t mind a little help with the dishes, I make the apple pie, you clean the pie dishes. It all works out rather nicely don’t you think?
I still have my fantasy of being discovered by the man of my dreams whilst singing a beautiful song, who just happens to be a wealthy prince with impeccable manners and fantastic dress sense. And I still want to be wooed, sung to and whisked off to exotic locations while wearing beautiful gowns. But on the way I’m happy to slay a few dragons and take down any evil queens who are lurking in the shadows. After all, a girl has to look out for herself.
And as for Happily Ever Afters? I think I’ll make my own.
This fabulous image was something I stumbled upon at http://www.doutorcaligari.com/2011/05/disney-princess-kick-ass.html
They have some other fabulous imagery and some naughty pin up versions of the princesses!